Wow this thread got long. I stopped reading after half of page one. but all I wanted to say was.
Greyfield makes very good points. But Carnas is a woman yes? So lashing out at people for no reason fits her chromosomes, Right?
LOL...Sorry bad joke. Carnas it is good you sought help for this advice. I have one idea that I don't think has been mentioned. Follow the mods and "SOME" of Greyfield's advice. But also buy your nerds some soda/pop or snacks/food as a way of apology. It will help smooth things over I think.
EDIT-I suffer from Corneal Migraines. I get migraines but they happen in my eyes. Mine are minor and 2-6 Excedrin take care of them within 5 hours. But sometimes I get them pretty bad. I just like to lay in a hot tub, I wish I owned one, in the dark and have it be quiet.