Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.


1001 things I'm not allowed to do.

   
342) I am not allowed to draw a card from the deck of many things
343) I am most definitely not allowed to draw a second card
344) I am never to even THINK about drawing a third card
345) If given the opportunity, I should simply kill my character off instead of drawing a 4th card.

Actually, the Halfling I play that did this pissed off a celestial monkey (who was already pissed because the Wand of Summon Monster 1 we use summons the same monkey every time by design), Lost all his possessions, gained 10k exp and an extra draw, then pulled 25 pieces of Jewelry worth twice the possessions he lost

346) I'm not allowed I read the flavor text of a 4th edition power aloud EVERY TIME I use it.
347) I'm not allowed to use really cheesy voices when I read the flavor text of a 4th edition power aloud EVERY TIME I use it.
348) When I read the flavor text of a 4the edition power in a cheesy voice, I'm not allowed to use that power anymore.

349) I am not allowed to cast Otiluke's Resilient Sphere on the fighter so that I can turn him on our enemies like a gigantic bowling ball.

350)I am not allowed to cast Otiluke's Resilient Sphere on the fighter and launch him out of a catapult.
351)I am not allowed to make more than 5 pop culture or anime/manga references when making my character.
352)I am not allowed to play a Warlock with a thick British accent.
353)I am not allowed to play a Dwarf with a Russian Accent.
353a)Especially if he has a bear mount.
353b)Double so if he is a gunslinger.
354)I am not allowed to have my character be a member of a SWAT team with a roit shield that is just a Cross with bullet proof glass around it.
355)I am not allowed to play a cat person, no matter what game we are playing, even if the rules allow and encourage it.
356)I am not allowed to use the Wish spell to give me a succubus cohort, even if my character is high enough level to have one via the Leadership feat.
356a)Nor am I allowed to wish away the succubus's LA so that I can have one at eight level.
357)I am not allowed to have more than 15 feats, including class features and feats gained via flaws.
358)I am not allowed roll for ability scores any more.
359)I am not allowed to have a sailing ship with intelligent Balista that can load themselves.
360)I am not allowed to play a depressed robot.

361.) I am not allowed to claim, that the mammaries of females add a +10 to charisma.
362.) If I am told that the mammaries of females do not add +10 to charisma, then I am not to argue that the male mammaries are then a -10 to charisma.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Voxanadu View Post
361.) I am not allowed to claim, that the mammaries of females add a +10 to charisma.
362.) If I am told that the mammaries of females do not add +10 to charisma, then I am not to argue that the male mammaries are then a -10 to charisma.
would a +2 work? xD Hmm I should look into the book of erotic fantasy for what sort of mods they might actually give? ^_^ glad to know a joke can continue here!

I'm going to add this into my signature now ^_^

384) I am not allowed to play a monster the way the book describes them, especially if they're Assassin Vines.
385) My players do not know how to use Sunder. Do not make them.

366) I am not allowed to preach out of the player's handbook, no matter what my religion is.

367.) When someone asks a serious question, I am not permitted to say "Vox" as the answer.
368.) Teraki, is the Ban Bat and I am not permitted to argue against it.





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