Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.

Corrupt A Wish

Granted. In true tradition of raping Roddenberry's corpse... the movie comes out. Instead of something that makes sense, like Borg or some Q-inspired joke... it turns out to be some kind of thing involving collision with a black hole and exposure to "unknown exotic energies" and then mating with a 4th dimensional life form.

But it could be worse... at least there weren't any midichlorians.

I wish George Lucas (maker of star wars- just so we don't play a "same name game" corruption, those are lame anyway) died before he had a chance to ruin his franchises.

Granted, but he fathered a son who carried on the legacy and made them ten times worse. Just think: Jar-Jar Binks, Jedi master!

I wish people actually participated in the democratic process by informing themselves and making value judgments, rather than just pulling levers every 12 months.

Granted. Everyone educates themselves and comes to the conclusion that only they can represent themselves. Though the political landscape becomes far more varied, those who make it into office tend to do so with only a few votes. (candidate 1 with 1 vote, 2 with 1 vote, ..., 6972 with 2 votes, 6973 with 1 vote)

I wish that we, as a species, were capable of thinking in terms of n dimensions, where n is a variable whose value that we, as individuals, may choose, and which may be changed by the individual in question at said individual's whim. (hopefully that is unambiguous enough...)

Granted, but the general imagination of humanity is unable to comprehend the implications of the n dimensionality and intentionally no longer imagines anything higher than a 3D universe, with a 4th constant dimension we imagine to be time.

I wish the election was over. I don't care who wins for this wish, I just want the political ads to stop.

Granted. This election. And all others. Are ended for all eternity as hitler's undead armies conquer the entire world with their vision of a new, zombified, master race.

I wish game/story/etc creators would come up with cool new horror monsters instead of just "re-imagining" the same tired old drech time and time again.

Granted. They're going to eventually find something so scary that it can kill people, though...maybe you.

I wish that my capacity to ignore sleep deprivation was expanded such that I may function normally for the first 48 hours before impacts are felt.

Granted. Your endocrine system collapses after the surgery, and you never sleep again. Or feel anything. Ever.

I wish the Hitler undead army from the earlier corruption was sprayed with the anti-zombie goo that turned me human again in the Dead Alive Dead Alive thread here ->

Granted. But these are ancient african magics zombies, not cheesy scifi zombies. Biochemical methods of any sort won't cure them. Now they're just slimy.

I wish a cataclysmic and horrifying death upon every life form from any planet that has so much as seen our star's light in its sky.

And don't you find that just a little cruel? A tad dramatic? A touch..nasty?...
Ah well. Granted. Twice.
1, No corruption needed with this wish, it's corrupt enough already.
2, Just in case you need me to corrupt it, fine. Every life form on every planet within around 4.6 billion light years instantly suffers a cataclysmic and horrifying death. Except you. The incredible cosmic event that caused all this death and destruction, lets call it 'armageddon', somehow leaves you alive. More than merely alive, in fact. You are transformed into a being that is truly immortal. Not just long lived, but something that cannot die, no matter what. You now have eternity alone to think about the consequences of your wish. No beings that were outside the area of effect will ever contact you, because it would take a minimum of 4.6 billion years for any signal to reach you, and why try sending anything into an area that huge that is completely dead. So you remain, lonely, watching the universe slowly expand and cool in heat-death. Enjoy.

I wish for something nice.

I'm not too sure that that's a

Granted. You get to join TanaNari.

I wish that a colony of dwarves (of the dwarf fortress variety) were transported to an unnocupied location on earth.

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