...now this is a wish that I could support...<sigh>

MadHatter: Granted. You gain the power to eat all you want and never gain any weight. Any time you lose weight, it is gone forever...

TanaNari: Granted. You become immune to change. Nothing can hinder you; nothing can harm you; nothing can change you. Not even yourself. You will always be as you are now, even while the rest of the world moves on.

I wish that no anti-piracy/anti-cp/anti-* act/law/executive order/policy/* were passed/issued/enacted/* with the potential to enact censorship/monitoring/data aggregation/* by any entity.

NINJAed
Granted. You are immune to all the stuff you just posted and you are still capable of enjoying things you would normally enjoy. Trouble is you don't enjoy them any more. It seems that without the pain, boredom and discomfort of everyday life, the pleasures you used to live for are now meaningless. While there is nothing physically stopping you from enjoying good food, entertainment, sex and stuff, they just don't do anything for you anymore. If every day is a sunny day, then what does a sunny day mean?

I wish I had some chocolate in the fridge.

Granted. Your fridge is now filled from ceiling to floor, from wall to wall, with a huge chunk of dark chocolate. However, because of the mass of the chocolate chunk, it is almost impossible to remove from the fridge. Also, you're not certain what happened to the things that were in the fridge...

I wish it would stop snowing. I f***ing hate shoveling...

Granted. There is a chocalate statue of a swordsage in your refrigerator. It menaces with sharpened spikes of chocalate. Its sword is sharper than one would think possible.

Granted. It begins hailing statues of swordsages.

I wish for my previous wish to be granted without detrimental corruption.

Granted. No such legislation pin the form of anti-anything ever passes again. However, even basic copyright is also lost, and there is no longer any original product made, since there is no point.

I wish it would snow in central Texas, but I still get paid for being the only person to show up at work.

Tananri-
You made a good point. I overlooked the enjoying part. My bad. Thanks for the correction.
Onigato-
Granted. All the snow all over the world is moved so it only snows in Central Texas. You show up to work and get paid but are now stuck there as you are buried beneath 1,345,000 feet of snow. It takes 45 days to free you. By that time you die of thirst and hunger as all you had to eat was urinal cakes, vending machine snacks and ice/snow.

I wish Rick Perry would fall into an active volcano and his whole bloodline be eliminated from the gene pool.
-Shane

Granted. Rick Perry and his family falls into a volcano. Because you pushed them in. You monster. Authorities will be arriving at your house momentarily for your crimes.

I wish I had a job as a state police detective right now.

"There is no point" and "rendered in stasis" count as the "boredom" clause and the "ability to enjoy" clause. I think my wish might just be the incorruptible one.


Granted. Turns out, however, Perry had an illicit affair with your mother some two and a half decades (give or take) ago.

Guess what that means for you.




EDIT: Was ninja'd. Incidentally, I think my corruption is crueler, drake.

For yours: Granted. However, it's in the state of North Dakota. You have a successful, but completely uneventful and mind-numbingly boring career until the Great Canadian Invasion of 2024. Where you're promptly sodomized and killed by the cybernetic moose squad.



Anyway. I'm sticking to my same wish until someone corrupts it without actually breaking one of my clauses.

45 days solid of 24 hour shifts at my pay? Okay, my wife may be a widow now, but at least she's a rich widow.

Granted, Rick Perry falls into a volcano, along with his entire family. Turns out, they were all robots, and now that they don't have to hide, they conquer the world in a matter of hours.

I wish to have a smartphone/tablet, legally obtained, and in my usable possession.

Good heaven, the ninjas are everywhere.

I grant the wish to be a detective, but you never get any assignments.

I also grant the wish of near invulnerability, but stating that you are able to enjoy all the normal things in life. Between super-powered rescue mission that only you have the ability to pull off. Sucks that so very many people need saving, all the time, and you never get more than a few minutes to yourself every week or so.

My previous wish stands.