Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.

Corrupt A Wish

It was intended as a bad joke referencing an even worse cartoon. Slap "did you get that thing I sent you" into google and behold the crap that adult swim airs.

Granted. Unfortunately, it also has faulty wiring from years of substandard care and storage. This results in the painful death of your closest living relative under the age of 10 when s/he hugs the adorable cartoonish toaster.

I wish for my faith in humanity to be restored. Which it was. By people not getting the above joke. And is corrupted by the ruining of my bad joke.

No, but seriously, I wish for my faith in humanity to be restored.

Granted. You now have great faith in humanity. In fact it completely supplants your faith in anything else, and humanity is completely infallible. Even the worst aspects of man are praised by you, loudly, and you quickly lose significant other, job, friends, and everything you own.

I wish for the bad live action stuff they broadcast on AS to go away, and they bring back anime everynight, not just saturdays. Keep Family Guy, American Dad and Robot Chicken. Everything else can go rot.

Granted but the bad live action crap is bought by every other network across america and they air it from 10am-8pm every day except Sunday which airs nothing but Barney reruns on every channel.

I wish for a free copy of every new book from every Author I love to be delivered to my house and no one will try to kill me or murder me because of it. Not even the book or anything book or package related.

Granted. But your membership to the company that arranges this service charges you more than it'd cost to order these books online yourself. "You're paying for the convenience, not the books" is their unofficial slogan.

I wish I already made a wish.

Granted. Since you wished to have made a wish, your wish is nulled, and the next person (me) gets two wishes.

I wish I had remembered to bring my Exalted core with me today, and I wish that it was midnight cst and my shift was over.

Granted you remembered your Exalted book but then remembered it was in your bag. When you go to the parking lot you find a pile of dead Elephants on your car. A total of 74 Elephants. When you try to move them aside members from PETA tazer you until you piss yourself. Good news is you lie in the snow asleep until midnight and wake up to your shift being cold and suffering from hypothermia.

I wish that all my bills came enclosed with hundred dollar bills that were real and the bills did not go lower or higher from what they are now and that I did not receive any new bills or that the money is fake, lost, stolen or in anyway harmful to me. As well as this money being received this wish entitles me to never have problems with the government or the IRS or any branch associated for taking whats mine.

Granted, all your bills - telephone bill, internet bill, electricity bill, heating bill, whatever applies to you - is sent printed on $100 bills. This renders them useless as money, but they make an awesome story over a few drinks.

I wish I didn't have broken shin bones.

Granted every other bone in your body but your shins is broken. Good news is sponge bathes by naked nurses rock. Bad news is you have an itch and you can't scratch it.

Side note awesome curse dude

I wish that I could be an anime character sometimes and live in an anime world. But with the ability to come back to the real world whenever I wanted.

Granted. You gain the ability to lucidly dream.

I wish that lucid dreaming worked for me.

Granted, you lucid dream the most horrible nightmares, which you control, but they are still horrible. It does not do to annoy the Night Stallion.

I wish more people understood that reference.

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