... The internet leads me to believe that everything in the universe that might possibly remotely resemble homosexuality has already been well documented, so I doubt I invented anything... TOTALLY willing to take credit, though.
Granted. Your house is completely and utterly destroyed by fire, destroying all your belongings. The insurance is enough to pay off the mortgage. And you can still live in the burnt out husk. The cost to REBUILD the house is, however, significantly higher than the insurance covered.
I wish for the moon to get knocked out of orbit somehow and collide with the earth sometime this week.