Granted. Your unpowered rubber duck becomes trapped in the currents, and carried into the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. With nothing to eat and nothing to drink, you die a slow wasting death under the relentless sun.

I wish that I could be one of my Shadowrun characters.

Granted. But along with your character, his/her nemesis appears and completely destroys you.

I wish I had a fish.

Granted. Dr Seuss Personally delivers your fish along with an infinite supply of rhymes with made up words and all. You go insane.

I wish for a chocolate cake.

Granted, but it's white chocolate.

I wish for a Lamborghini!

Granted: Lamborghini (total wreck). Please pay impound fees and note which junkyard you'd like it taken to.

Wish: I wish I had some tritip.

Granted: It's tainted with bovine spongiform encephalopathy and you only find out after you eat it.

I wish the next person to post has their wish granted satisfactorily.

Granted, but it's going to be corrupted.

I wish I was a real boy.

Granted. You are now a six year old boy. But so is everyone else.

I wish to see a to-the-death battle royale cage match between the most recent (including current) 8 U.S. presidents, and a very large colony of flesh eating ants.

Granted. But Obama dies and Biden dies of a heart attack at his good luck. Due to some very unhappy widows, a power vacuum, and a few incompetent military leaders, China has nuked America.

I wish that no PbP game on this site would ever die again.

Granted. Except for this one.