The ability to wake up on your birthday, on christmas, other days when you will receive a present and know the exact details of the wrapping paper people used to wrap your presents. Of course, if you wake up nt knowing such details then the presnts will not be wrapped.

The ability to predict with 100% accuracy whether or not the next Michael Bay film will or will not feature an explosion.

Bendy Thumb

Your farts release an irresistible rush of pheromones, which causes the Gender you do not prefer to to flock after you relentlessly. Better hope you don't end up in jail.

There are Michael Bay films without explosions?

The ability to change the rotational direction of water as it drains in your toilet bowl.

The ability to provide psychological counseling to lemmings.

The ability to always get a taxi when you need it, but the driver only speaks languages you don't understand.

That's the point.

The ability to know and understand intimately the intent of the Founding Fathers of the United States, specifically with regards to the content and scope of the Constitution, to the extent that you can instantly determine whether a given action is counterproductive to the Republic.

I feel like that could actually be pretty damn useful under certain circumstances, particularly as a lawyer or politician.

Tell that to Cassandra.


The ability to explain jokes to people by referencing greek myths would be more useful.

... See what I did there?