285) As a bard, I am not allowed to take the spell "Magic Probe", from the book of Erotic Fantasy
286) As a generic spellcaster, I am not allowed to the spell "
It's an awesome spell, it tells you all spells and effects currently in effect on a character
Magic Probe", from the book of Erotic Fantasy
287) I am not allowed to tell the DM when I snag spells from the book of Erotic Fantasy
289) I am not allowed to tell other players whern I snag spells from the book of Erotic Fantasy
290) I must tell the DM where my stuff comes from even if it violates another rule.
291) If it comes from the book of erotic fantasy, I must immediatly get rid of it once it is discovered.
292) Even if The Book of Erotic Fantasy is allowed, I am not allowed to play an Incubus, especially if one of the party members is female.
293) I am not allowed to cast magic missile more than once a fight.
294)I am not allowed to refer to my Wand of Fireball as a 'Boom Stick'.
295)I am not allowed to play a rogue with rankes in UMD.*
*I once quickly made our wizard feel inadiquite because all my wands with touch spells hit far more often than his, and he was a 'blaster' Wizard too, which made it funny when I was hitting more often with things like Flame and Acid Arrow. I ended up getting more wands with utility spells like detect secret door and tongues.
297)I am not allowed to call our Anthro Wolf Sorcerer 'Walking Rule 34'.
298)I am not allowed say that I can punch through a boulder with a 20 strength, disptie the fact that my strength score says I can.
299)I am not allowed to play a two-weapon fighting wizard. I made the two-weapon fighting ranger feel crappy. Long story. <.<
300)I am not allowed to make my kingdom have 300 or more rules unless they have al teast one loop hole.
301) As a DM I am not allowed to make a maze with more than 2 dead ends.
302) I am not allowed to set poisonous flowers in the world. All players will eat them.
303) I am not allowed to put attractive females into my campaign and reasonably expect it to progress without numerous charisma checks.
304) As a player I never spend gold on clothing. I am not allowed to LARP unarmored characters.
305) I am not allowed to put skill points into nutrition awareness.
306) I am not allowed to use Inspire Courage if my bard is playing a triangle. My bard is not allowed to play a key-tar.
307) I am not allowed to play any form of anthropomorphic sea life, Whale Monk, Squid Samurai, etc. Just because it's written doesn't mean it's balanced
308) I am not allowed to play Halfling Bards, three foot tall gigolo's are just creepy
309) I am not allowed to use fruit as a bludgeoning weapon, it doesn't matter what the Drunken Master class says.
310) I am not allowed to wield unconscious foes as flails, it doesn't matter what the Drunken Master class says
312) I am not allowed to dump all my dice in a d6 Star Wars game into the ability 'Bi*ch Slap'
I am, however, allowed to be horribly murdered when I use this ability on Lord Vader
313) I am not allowed to parry the Death Star with my light saber, it doesn't matter if the rules make it seem like I should