Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.


1001 things I'm not allowed to do.

   
147) If my players are 'breaking numbering conventions' I am not allowed to smite them. My smiting must be strictly limited to their characters.

150) I am not allowed to use illusion spells. Even if I can make the BBEG think that the bridge is still there.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Divinedragonslayer View Post
150) I am not allowed to use illusion spells. Even if I can make the BBEG think that the bridge is still there.
Your group sucks, then. I'd actually LOVE more players pulling crap like this.

I love Sherlock Holmes the villains. Makes me very happy as a player and villain. I once killed a dragon, only a young adult, in a game before. By convincing it to multiply his hoard with the nearby cities wealths. Then hitting it wit ha maxamized ray of enfeeblement spell and watching it get crushed to death by it's own hoard.

Then there is the drinking contest I won against the Dwarf Nobleman to get me a magic axe for my Dwarf Fighter. I did the whole bet you cant' drink 4 shots before I down 2 mugs of ale. But you can't touch the glass with your hands thing. Then placed the empty mug ontop of the 4th shot so he couldn't get at it.

151.) I am not allowed to convince the female characters that large ample breasts provide a +1 natural armor bonus towards their internal organs and provide a circumstance bonus to swimming.
152.) I am not allowed to changed the name of the Rod of Wonder to the D&D Clown Gun.
153.) I am not allowed to use a soda can as the miniature for my enlarged 2xs Dwarven Cleric in full plate. A pepsi can at that.

154) I am not allowed to let my character have a natural rod of extent. Nor a rod of quicken.

That doesn't make sense Kerim. Or is even funny.

155) I am not allowed to play a character who uses two-weapon fighting to wield whips
156) I am not allowed to play a warlock with Evard's Black Tentacles
157) I am not allowed to play an awakened Octopus
158) Perfom Bondage is NEVER a class skill, so obviously, I'm not allowed to use it in conjunction with whips, Evard's Black Tentacles or the Octopus in the previous
159) I'm not allowed to acknowledge whips, tentacles, Octopi, or squids in any form or fashion. In fact, let's add displacer beasts and anything else with tentacles to that list.
160) Regarding all of the previous, I am not allowed to use the book of Erotic Fantasies in conjunction with any of the previous, as it scares the other players
161) I am most definitely NOT allowed to use the Moe flaw with a tentacle focus when heading into the Underdark, the Ilithids are too terrified by me.

162) When playing a Halfling wizard who follows a god of Mischief, I am not allowed to use a Rod of Wonder, especially with 3 separate table of effects to roll on. Dumping a half ton of manure on a Hell Hound, and the party Warlock, while hilarious, smells really bad.





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