Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.


Epic Forum Member Beatdown Thread

   
Epic Forum Member Beatdown Thread

Ladies and Gentlemen...

LET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRUMMMMMBLE!!!!!!

The purpose of this stupid game is to put a beatdown on the poster above you. Kicks, punches, weapons, finishing moves (why do I hear Mortal Kombat all of a sudden?)...you describe it, it happens! Well, in a fantasy-it's-a-simple-forum-game kind of way. As an example, I'm posting right now. The next poster would say something like:

KERIM: Before Scarecrow71 can get the first sentence out, I waltz in through the front door and blast him with my pair of 9 mm semi-automatic pistols, spraying his blood all over the wall.

Then the next poster would be all like:

TANANARI: And when that's done, I pick up Kerim and feed him to Cthulu!

You get the idea. Now, as Mills Lane would say...

Let's get it on!

Well, because the stuff from Tana could actually happen, I'll go from that.

Inside Ctulhu's stomach I become friends with an undead army, led by Richard. We rip out of Ctulhu's stomach, go to Scarecrow's house, and fwoosh, freeze, Acid (?) him until he's dead, then raise him to be part of our undead army.

While Kerim has has back turned, from the slagged remains of poor Scarecrow's house, I summon the ghostly forms of the Wannahackaputer Tribe buried beneath. The glowing green warriors howl in fury and tear into the zombie army with tomahawks and short bows, reducing the slightly ripe fiends to little more than quivering flesh and gore. When the last of the ghostly braves has faded from this world, moving on to the next, I punch Kerim in the solar plexus and throw a handful of loose change into his face while he's off balance. 'If I only had an @$$ whoopin'!'

Rocks fall, Bumblor gets buried in rubble.

(I'm seriously having Toy Story flash backs here 'Nuh uh, I brought my dinosaur who eats force field dogs!!!')

Seeing as I am now a zombie thanks to Kerim...

I stumble and moan my way across the battlefield, clawing at everything that moves. When I get to Bumblor, I grasp him in my icy fingers and snack on his tasty brains.

you aren't a zombie, you're a skeleton.

Sorry, you're now a pile of bonedust. I acidentally ran over you with my car.

Cthulhu's for wimps. I go Rambo on kerim, break out the rocket launcher, explode him, the car he's in, the pile of bone dust he's sitting on, and the brainless corpse inexplicably laying next to them.

Due to the large number of undead armies popping up next to the ruins of scarecrows house the army gives me control of their kill sat at which point I spam the hell out of that bastard the center of the the blast seems to be around some swiss cheese.




 

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