Non Sequitur

A place for light-hearted forum games and other threads that don't promote discussion.

Bad courtship ideas

Originally Posted by Nocturnal View Post
t everything you do, no matter how innocuous, is not sexual. e.g., "I just want you to know, my buying these five cucumbers, two melons, and bunch of bananas... That's not a sexual thing."

Kill every attractive male on the planet so that eventually you'll rank as most desirable.
You stole these from SMBC. Society awaits your apology.

That is absolutely correct. Though to be fair, I would have thought of the second one on my own. Who wouldn't? I'm sorry. Maybe I should shave off my beard in penance. Or because it's that ugly.

But hey, the crashing into a pretty driver thing to get her phone number is good, huh?

I should have just said "Anything on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal."

Being honest.

Originally Posted by Eliza Jane View Post
LOL...yeah...that's bad. I would never undress in front of a guy thinking it was ok because he was gay. That's hollywood b.s. We don't do that.
I could write a book on bad pick up lines that I have had used on me or my g/fs. (And a few I actually thought were cute)
But then why do my lesbian friends always want me to undress in front of them...?


... OH!

Re: undressing: That's not necessarily true anyway, some girls will undress around anyone they know fairly well, some only in private. It's more about how comfortable someone is with there body (or, if you're in highschool, how much they care if someone thinks they're a slut) than anything else.
Same thing applies to guys, except that guys generally don't have to worry about being called a slut.

On topic:
The obligatory "Does this smell like chloroform to you?"
"Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like you plowed face-first into the earth at terminal velocity."
"Hey, you look fun. Wanna go [self-censored]?" This one is very successful in some situations, actually.

I'll think of more...

Well, I am sure there are always exceptions, but I can tell you as a girl I would definitely not undress in front of just anybody, even people I know well, and I am very comfortable with my body. I also know that none of my g/fs just go and undress in front of people, unless we are dating that person. Sometimes we will change in front of each other, but only when it is necessary. (Like we are in a hurry.)

The best lines are the ones that make me laugh. Cheesy never works with me. Funny, that will at least get you a to say something else.

One of the funniest was this guy, he was tall, cute - he came up to our table (me and 3 other girls - guys, if you walk up to a table of girls by yourself, that is somewhat impressive, takes a lot of nerve) and asks if we have seen a woman looking around like she is lost. He says it's his wife, and if we see her, he will be over at the bar, can we tell her to go over there. He then says "you don't know what she looks like, let me show you her picture" He takes out this picture of this, like 45 year old woman who weighs about 400 pounds, and it looks so ridiculous we all burst out laughing. He ended up hanging out with us all night. He was funny and did go out with on of my girlfriends, but it never went anywhere. I know, it's pretty stupid, but it was different and funny.

So... is that a bad pickup idea... or...? Keep to the concept of the thread and tell us some bad pickup lines!

Oh, haha, that reminds me of this ridiculous story with two girls I came upon tanning at the beach. My flirt-ray was on wide-dispersal and I was basically flirting with both of them pretty well, and when I was about to leave and asked for phone numbers, they went, "Wait, we're confused, which one of us are you hitting on?" I didn't know! I just kind of assumed both? What's wrong with having both? Both were pretty, so I picked the one who skied, but she already had a boyfriend. The other looked kind of disappointed, but I couldn't change my mind at that point, have her feel like a second choice. There must have been a better way of handling that. I should have just said, "Both!"

Bad pickup lines:
"You look like my future wife!" (Ugh! People actually use these.)
"Are your pants mirrored? Because I see myself in them."
"You look like you could help me! I'm trying to collect the full set of STDs!"

Good idea:
Pretending to care about politics to impress activist girls.
Bad idea:
Going to "Revoke women's rights!" rallies to impress activist girls.

LOL...Yes SIR! :P

I have had one used on me like your first one in your last post -
"Hi, you look like my future, former wife." Confusing
"If you don't want to *&%^, I suppose a bl*# job is out of the question." (Totally didn't work, but later, me and my g/fs laughed at that one)
"Did you clean your pants with Windex because I can practically see myself in them." Weak
"If I were going to re-arrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together." Lame

I just txt'd m g/fs to come up with more....

"F*** me if I'm wrong, but is your name George?" (Or any name you hope the girl wouldn't have.)
"If I asked you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?" (Works great with logicians!)

Eliza Jane: I didn't mean just like suddenly start stripping for no reason :P

Nocturnal: Both is always the best choice. Though not usually the best phrasing.

On topic:
Good Idea: "You know, you're pretty cute. It'd be a shame if you got mauled by a bear."
Bad Idea: "If I were a bear, I'd rip your face off."


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