Non Sequitur

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1001 things I'm not allowed to do.

   
3296. No asking to roll Handle Animal on party members, no matter how they behave - such requests are to be denied in advance!
3297. Behaving in a way that would make the above request seem reasonable would lead to us having The Talk. Yes, it doesn't matter if your IC religion says it's alright.

3298. I solemnly swear I will not turn the dead half-giant's armor and the party's wagon into an improvised ballistic missile. (Again)

3299. No Wild Shaping into bulls, storming McDonald's, and talking about the vengeance of the animal kingdom. No matter how horrible the meat industry is.

3300. I am no longer allowed near wagons.

3302. I am no longer allowed to make any character that is capable of countering the DM's favorite tactic of ambushing the party and wiping out 3/4ths of us.

3303. I am no longer allowed to use Hide in Plain Sight to stealth away from someone that I am currently speaking with in mid sent

3304. I am *probably* not allowed to use the corpses of fallen foes as cover in order to take advantage of my ungodly Hide checks any more.
3305. I am no longer allowed to use wagons...

3306. I am no longer allowed to hide behind the cart's wheels without asking the GM whether or not they are solid or spoked. (This one is entirely true, it just wasn't me that assumed they were solid without asking. We got running gags out of that for a good three months or so.)

3307. If my character can One-Punch the DM's BBEG before level 5, I am no longer allowed to make a character who uses Unarmed Strikes.




 

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