First off, I'd like to thank Foltor for giving me this idea, when he posted his threads asking about useless magical items and useful mundane items.
When I googled for 'most useless magic item ever', I ended up finding a Reddit thread touching on the idea of a Book of Misspelling; a cursed item that, when read, causes the spellcaster's spells to flub for the next few days by changing one little letter in the title (and thus the meaning of the spell).

Now because I found this really funny, why don't we make a game out of it?
The rules are essentially the same as Corrupt a Wish; someone posts a spell, then the next poster down adds a typo, a mispronunciation, toys with the definition, or et-cetera, adding a brief description of the new spell.

For example:

Poster 1:
"Imprisonment."

Poster 2:
"Imprison Mint: You conjure a tiny cage around the nearest peppermint lolly.

Blink."

Poster 3:
"Blink: You cause your eyelids to start blinking rapidly, giving you a 20% chance to avoid gaze attacks.

Mind Fog."

...And so on.

And yes, I know, this does look a bit limited to D&D spells. I'd prefer to stick with established spells but if you want you can make up your own for someone to misspell, or take from another game, or whatever.

I'll start:

Produce Flame

I'll give it a shot Avaday

Produce Flame: Stalks of asparagus with a strong reddish-orange color appear in your hand. They can be consumed as normal.

Alarm.

This is just going to be stupid, but here we go.

All Arms: Object touched becomes a disembodied arm. Hands not included.

Prismatic Sphere

Prismatic Sphere: Conjures a large sphere that fits into caster's hand. Any light that strikes it produces a rainbow.

That classic of classics: Magic Missile.

Magic Mistle- generates a fine spray of magic.


Prestidigitation. (Because it's already hard enough to spell).

Press Digitation: Conjures a tiny spectral hand to apply pushing force to the target of your choice. Good for pressing buttons at a safe distance.

Fireball!

Free ball: Generates a small bouncy ball. May be used up to 3 times, plus caster level (maximum 10), per day.

Turn Undead!

Turn Undead: All undead cast upon rotate a randomized amount between and including 90 and 270 degrees (1d182 if you want to get specific). Does not discombobulate at all

Blood to Water.

Blood to Waiter: Thoroughly exsanguinates a target and animates their blood to become a liquid homunculus. The homunculus, once formed, immediately leaves, and returns 2d10 rounds later with a gourmet meal, which it presents to its caster before disappearing again.

You know, there's actually a spell called Extract Water Elemental that does somewhat similar to this.


Owl's Wisdom?

Owl's wisdome... summons a large half sphere full of owls that then proceed to urinate on the target.


Augury.