For the Love of Money and Booze

Game Masters

Game Information

Game Description

A dark lit room. Several figures hunch over a small wooden table. They speak in hushed voices, discussing dark and mysterious plans. Their brows furrow, drenched in sweat.

One the figures points dramatically to the map spread across the table. "Here?"

Another figure shakes its head. "Gilbert's Gutters cleared the place out just last week."

The first figure pauses for a second, scratches its chin, then points to another part of the map.

"Olsen boys scoured that one clean." A third figure says with a sigh.

The first figure, agitated further, places a finger at another spot.

""Crimson Blades"

Another spot.

"The Hackers"


"Acquisitions Inc."

"DAMMNIT!" The first figure slams a dagger halfway into the table. It creaks under the strain. "Is there anywhere that the competition hasn't looted already?" The figures voice turns from authoritative and calm to high pitched and whiny. "How are we supposed to pay for food if every bloody dungeon in the area's already been sacked?"

A door opens and the light of a torch streams in and lights the room. An old and grizzled face pokes its head through the opening. "Would you quiet down in here? I'm being nice enough to let you blokes rest up in my barn until ye make it big and all that, but if you don't pipe down ye'll wake up Betsy."

The first figure chuckles in embarrassment. "Sorry about that, we don't wanna wake up yer wife or nuttin."

The newcomer raises a bushy eyebrow. "Wife? Bah. The old bird croaked a long time ago, thank the gods. No, Betsy's mah prize winning hog. She's sleeping farther in, so keep yer traps shut!"

The farmer leaves closes the door, darkening the room once more.

Awkward Silence.

"So what are we gonna do?"

"Hit the hay and hope we find a job tomorrow." The first figure sighs. "We need money for food and lodging. If we can't find a dungeon to plunder soon we'll... *gulp*...have to take more honest and respectable vocations."

Everyone shudders.


Business hasn't been good. Your adventuring company, newly created, has been out of work for a week now. All the good dungeons have already been plundered by gangs of weapon toting freaks like yourselves who happened to come up with the idea before you did. Both your pockets and patience are wearing thin and things aren't looking too good. What does the next day hold for your band of misfits? What hilarity will ensue?

I'm Paper_Bard, and I will be your Dungeon Master for this amusing and irreverent adventure in the standard Dungeons And Dragons 4th Edition Campaign Setting.

This game will focus on humor and fun, but will try to still have round characters and interesting plots and character development. One Part Slayers, one part Discworld, and all fun!

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