Underleaf Posted February 25, 2023 Clone Share Posted February 25, 2023 Sabyne Kuznetsov How long had they been on the road? She honestly couldn't recall. What she knew was that she was tired and hungry. Sabyne let her mind settle, contemplating nothing of the past or the future, for a long while. The blaze of the campfire warmed her skin, the sound of its crackling drowning out the sounds of the others. It was freedom, a brief respite, and then she felt a presence beside her. The female Kuznetsov didn't need to look to know who it was. Their connection let so much go unsaid, the understanding happening without a word spoken. Sabyne took a deep breath in and let a heavy sigh out. "Come to simply sit beside your sister, or are you ready to talk?" She didn't turn her gaze to meet his, afraid to see judgment or pity in his matching midnight eyes. Shayne Kuznetsov Shayne raised an eyebrow, but took a seat next to his sister all the same. "Am I ready to talk? And here I was just about to ask if YOU were ready to talk." One thing was for certain, at least one of the Kuznetsov twins found all this traveling around exhausting. He hadn't been home a month before he'd had to take off chasing his sister! He missed sleeping in a warm bed, the taste of the shitty ale in Three Sisters, and most of all, not having to worry if he was going to be attacked by something in the darkness when he drifted off. He stared into the fire, watching it pop and flicker in silence for a long moment. A plume of smoke wafted his direction and it waved it away, coughing and squinting until it was gone. "A lot has happened." He didn't specify when in particular. The silence continued, lingering like a fog in the air between them. "So you're going to stop trying to do this alone, right? I mean...I'm not trying to bring up the past but...You almost died in the tower running so far ahead of everyone else. You wandered off with that Barghest. You tried to offer yourself up as food to that crazy dryad...None of that is okay." He turned his head to look over at his sister, his expression shockingly calm. "There is no world where I leave you to be dryad food. At least next time offer Liam or something." Sabyne Kuznetsov Sabyne shook her head to the side, crimson strands wavering in the wind, matching the fickle flames that kissed the air. "That's ironic. Don't you think?" She turned her gaze to finally look upon him. "Or is it simply a double standard." Her shoulder shrugged as her lips settled into a relaxed frown and she returned her sad eyes back to the blaze before them. "You...you left. And I've been alone ever since." The strong woman bit back her tongue, trying to maintain the calm the fire had given her. "I had mops and pops...but I didn't have you, Shayne. That morning, that morning when you weren't there...it was like a part of me was missing. We had been..." Irritation began to slice through her words. She claimed a stick off the ground, stabbing the flames with it. "I shouldn't have to explain it to you. That, or I meant less to you than you to me. But you were half of me. I didn't know who I was without my brother." She still didn't, but left that part unsaid. Again, her head shook side to side. "You left. I was alone. Am alone. And I'm just trying to make sure everyone else is kept safe." Sabyne stabbed the fire again, this time the stick snapped with the force. She dropped it with frustration evident. "There is no world where I leave you..., that's almost funny." Shayne Kuznetsov All he could do was sigh and scratch his chin. A jumble of emotions flooded to the surface, so many he didn't even know how to process them at first. He was angry and annoyed that she blamed him. Jealous that she'd gotten to stay in Three Sisters. He'd taken her place without a moment's hesitation, and yet now that he'd finally returned it seemed any hope of getting to live that peaceful, normal life he'd been pining for was melting like snow in his hands. Things had been hard for the family after he left, Shayne could understand that. But it wasn't like he hadn't suffered. The idea that his sister would think he was just off galavanting about, leaving his family on a whim...that is what hurt him the most. As close as Shayne had been with his sister, she hadn't even given him the benefit of the doubt, and part of him hated her for that. "Most people would just be grateful to have their long lost brother back. But, not Sabyne...She just dwells on the past, like everyone should just pity her, like she was the only one with hardships. She just blames her brother like everything that happened was his fault." He could feel his anger bubbling to the surface and he wiped a sleeve in front of his face to make sure he wasn't crying. He pulled his arm back to inspect it, as if he'd been wiping a mote of soot from his face. "You're not alone. You've never been alone." He turned to face his sister, his face contorted with frustration and pain and resentment. "You have no idea what it feels like to be alone." He turned away, looking back to the fire. "But somehow you got it in your head I'm the bad guy, and it is okay to just happily rush off to your death...So whether you believe it or not, I'm going to do what I've always done...continue to look out for you. And if you don't like it, you'll have to do a lot more than punch me." Shayne picked up a handful of snow and tossed it into the fire, the flames flickering and sizzling. Sabyne Kuznetsov "Ya know, Shayne, when we were kids, this..." Her hand twirled around in between them, "This was amusing. But now..." Sabyne sighed, her frustration clear. "Now, it is simply exhausting." The fire crackled, a breeze sent burning smoke into her eyes, causing them to glisten and blink. Her forefinger trailed along her brow, pulling strands from across her face to tuck behind an ear, as she turned her gaze to look upon her brother. The scar across her eye was on full display. "I don't think you're the bad guy, Shayne...but I don't know what to think beyond that. You've told me almost nothing. That you had to go...that it was complicated... that I don't understand." Her lips dipped into a frown. "How am I supposed to understand? How am I supposed to understand, Shayne?" She paused for a long moment, staring at him, hoping to find answers in the face of her twin. "What I know, all I know, is that one morning I woke up and my brother wasn't there. Pops looked at me differently, Mops cried a lot, and no one explained what had happened or when you'd come home. Grandpops died. Years went by. The village was attacked, Pops lost an arm, things...things changed." I changed. "And you still weren't there." Tears ran down her cheeks without her knowing. "Where did my best friend go? Fill in the blanks. Help me understand." Help. Rarely Sabyne asked for help, but that was what she needed most. Shayne Kuznetsov Growing up, Mops had always scolded Shayne for being so stubborn. She'd throw her hands into the air in exasperation and exclaim that he was going to be 'just like his father'. Shayne had never considered the idea that bad, but now as he looked over at his sister, saw a true stubbornness akin to Pops', he understood what Mops was talking about. If only Mops could seen how level headed Shayne had become, though the fact that he was the reasonable one would really only make her worry more. Sabyne was like a dog biting a poison sumac branch, she had no idea what she wanted was dangerous and was entirely unwilling to let it go. Shayne rubbed his hand across his face and took a deep breath. He had no idea how to deal with her anymore. Sabyne had become too hard headed to argue with, and too persistent to just walk away from. He turned to look his sister dead in the eye. "There isn't anything in this world that could force me to keep secrets from you. But you're right. I did have to go. It is complicated. And you don't understand. But did you ever think for a second that not knowing is better than knowing?" He shook his head. "Of course you didn't. And you don't trust me enough to believe I have your best interest at heart. Also..." Shayne took a deep breath, still weighing the options of his next words carefully. He knew how she would react, but even that was better than the alternative. "Four years I was gone. Pops sure as hell didn't tell you during all that time. Even after he lost his pops, and a son, and an arm." "This isn't about keeping secrets or explaining so you understand. It is about the safety of our family. This isn't something fun you're missing out on. I didn't leave because I wanted to Sabyne! I left because I had no choice. I left in the middle of the night, without saying goodbye to Mops or to you. I didn't even get to help put Grandpops to rest or say goodbye. So you think about that next time you're all angry about me leaving. Remember: At least you had our family...I didn't have anything." Sabyne Kuznetsov Her brow scrunched in confusion and irritation as he spoke. He was repeating what she had said to him, which were statements she repeated from past conversations from him to her. It was the cyclicle type of arguments they had always had as kids, the type that drove Mops nuts and usually led to her forcing them to play outside. While often a memory like this, one that could tie their current reality to their past, would bring a calmness to Sabyne, it failed to do so this time. Shayne's hard stare into her, the harshness of his voice, and the sliver of the truth leaking out, it was enough to keep her in the bitterness of the moment. "Pops? Pops knew?" Of course Pops had known. A part of her knew he had, she had seen the way he changed after her brother disappeared. The man had become both softer and harder on her. His eyes carried a constant apology. Sabyne recalled all the random moments over the last four years where she had seen Pops falter, and her instant reply was always "It's alright, we all miss him. We won't know why he left till he comes back, then we can each slap him upside the head." But now...now it was clear. He had known why Shayne left. She broke away from his gaze, it was too painful. It all felt like a lie. Family First. If that were true, then why the lies. Sabyne shook her head and swallowed the sour saliva that built at the back of her throat. Drums began to beat in the distance, anger a more comfortable emotion than pain. It had helped through these last few years, allowed her to focus and move forward, not wallow in sadness. "Fine Shayne. If that's how you need this to be, then fine. You can keep your secrets. You and Pops can keep your secrets. Hells, Mops probably knows too. So sure, this is fine." Her skin crawled with irritation. How had this become them against me? The pulse of her heart breaking pounded in her ears. Sabyne stood, unable to stay seated close to him. She could feel her shoulders and neck tensing. The flames of the fire shifted in the wind, licking the air around her legs. She shook her head again. "I didn't do anything wrong, Shayne. Why does it feel like I did something wrong?" Shayne Kuznetsov Always the martyr. Even when they were kids, Sabyne had always managed to make everything about her. He didn't know why he thought it would be different, she had never been one to sit down and have a conversation like an adult. Especially recently, every time they'd argued she would storm off without resolution. Not that Shayne had been much better when they were children, but at least he could say he was now. He took another deep breath, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose, trying to stave off the headache trying to reason with her usually brought on. "No Sabyne...Mops doesn't know." He said flatly, unable to hide the annoyance in his voice. "And no one said you did anything wrong either. But if you trusted me, really trusted me...You'd just trust in the fact that if and when I can tell you, I will. Stop making it sound like the entire family is against you, when you know damn well that has never, and will never be the case." She made it sound like he enjoyed keeping this from her, as though he enjoyed ANY of this. Sabyne was clearly too stuck in her own spiral to know or care how this made anyone else feel, but he was getting very tired of running in circles with her. What he needed was for her to comprehend, but him telling her words wasn't going to help...He needed a new approach. "Here is what I'd like you to do...Enumerate the possibilities as to why I wouldn't or perhaps couldn't tell you something obviously this important. Strive for something other than the ever absurd 'my family hates me', since I can tell you with confidence, that is not it." Sabyne Kuznetsov Somethings change. And yet...it all stays the same. Sabyne closed her eyes and breathed through her nose. This was the Shayne of old, the Shayne she had grown up with. He may wear fancier clothes, but he was still the same boy who deflected every attempt at an answer that pertained to him. More than once she had been grounded because he had confessed her crime in order to avoid his own. And here, now, all those years later, he was still finding ways to deflect, to refuse to answer the simplest of questions. She took another breath, it was deeper. The smoke of the fire sinking deep into her lungs, burning. Words formed in her mind but pushed them away, knowing they were pointless, he wouldn't respond or answer with anything of value. She could almost imagine it. Trust? I am to trust you, but you clearly don't trust me. How can I trust you? What have I done to imply you can't? Sabyne... When in doubt, he would do nothing but say my name. Why are you acting like I'm the only one who's changed? "Why are you acting like I'm the only one who's changed?" The question left her lips as the fictitious conversation faded from her mind. Her crimson hair flicked side to side as she shook her head again. She sighed, coughing out some of the smoke, and sat back down beside her brother. "I don't believe you all hate me. But I do believe you don't trust me." Sabyne turned her gaze from the flames to look back at her brother. "This shouldn't be so hard, Shayne. You were my best friend." Shayne Kuznetsov Circles. Around and round they'd go, where this would end, only the gods could know. He'd done all he could for her. He looked at his sister with a coldness he generally reserved only for Liam. "It is like you haven't heard a single. damn. word. I've said Sabyne.... You want me to be honest? Get your head out of your ass and listen to someone else for once! Do you think I don't know this hasn't been hard on you, on the family? Do you think I'm so twisted I enjoy this? Everyone changes. That's life. Get over it. Your problem isn't that you've changed, it's that you're not listening. So either prove your head isn't full of rocks and think about what I said...or don't." She'd never been this frustrating when they were younger. Just as clingy for sure, but not nearly as frustrating. He'd already used every loophole he could think of, but it was clear his sister hadn't learned much aside from how to hit things since he'd been gone. Which was a shame. He'd always thought she'd have grown up to be the wittier of the two. Like the time she'd placed first among her peers in finishing school. The male Kuznetsov twin paused to consider what he'd just been thinking. No. That wasn't Sabyne. Their family hadn't even been wealthy enough to know what a finishing school was. He took a deep breath, more annoyed with himself for not being able to separate the things in his mind than anything else. Sabyne Kuznetsov There had been mist in her eyes, tears had trailed down her cheeks. But the heat of the flames dried them, soot ridden paths wandered down her skin as those midnight orbs burned from the absence of moisture now. Sabyne closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, a mannerism she had picked up in the short time Shayne had been home. "We aren't listening to each other. We suck at this." She took a deep breath and tried to push away the drums that beat in the distance. Looking back to the fire, she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, avoiding turning to face her brother. "I'm not running off to get myself killed, Shayne." She shook her head, trying to find the words to explain what she had been trying to explain to herself. "I'm chasing...I'm..." A sigh escaped and she tilted her neck back to look up to the sky. The stars were still missing from the night. She felt so alone. "The night the village was attacked. It was exhilarating and terrifying. But then Pops arm...and everything else faded. It didn't matter how many we had killed, it didn't matter homes were burning, it didn't matter you weren't there. In that moment, it was me and Pops, and all that blood." Her breathing had picked up pace. "So much blood. And I knew he would die from the wound." She looked back to the flames. "I begged. I begged him to stay, I begged the heavens to help, I begged the burning anger in me to find a way." Her head shook side to side, knowing that what she said made no sense. "And it worked. I suddenly had the power to heal him. I don't know how or why...but it's like everything answered at the same time." Sabyne brought a palm to the side of her temple, tapping it to match the rhythm of the drums. "And now I'm trying to understand it, chase it. The priests say I have been blessed by the Axiomatic General. A herald for his will." Her lips dipped into a frown as her palm continued to patter out the pattern. "But there's more to it. I'm so angry. All the time, Shayne. And these gifts are fueled by it." She closed her eyes and swallowed away sour saliva. "I stay in front of everyone so if my anger overtakes me I hit someone who isn't in the party. It's the only way I can protect you all from me. And I keep moving forward to chase what is in me, to understand it." The female Kuznetsov let out a long breath. She had never said as much on the topic to anyone, even herself. "I know it doesn't make sense, so I don't expect you to understand. Hells, I don't understand. But if you could stop being an ass, it would help." Shayne Kuznetsov Shayne held his tongue at his sister's mention of 'we' sucking at this. He did his best to plaster a passive expression on his face, hiding the sheer frustration he felt swirling inside of him. Instead he focused on listening. None of it made a damn bit of sense, but he listened. Part of him wondered if when she said things, she realized how crazy they sounded. Not from a perspective of possibility, but from a logical standpoint. Still, what a pair they made. One apparently blessed by a god, and the other forced into eternal servitude by an Arch Fey. Perhaps if anything, she'd drawn the short end of the straw, since Shayne at least kept his wits about him while using his gifts. He pondered her words as she continued, trying to find the connection And then, of course, the little wench went and insulted him. The male Kuznetsov twin took a deep breath, gathering all the wits and patience there was between the two of them. He wouldn't remind her this was the first time she'd ever used words to describe ANY of this. Just tears. And shouts. And storming off. If you could call any of those a way to describe something. Honestly, he had no idea what to even say. She was 'blessed by a god to have uncontrollable fits of rage' sounded like a shite excuse for not thinking if ever there was one. But, at the very least, she did have the power to heal. And she'd smote his childhood hero into oblivion, he'd even heard the pounding of strange drums once. Still...Running thoughtlessly to the front so she didn't stab anyone else was just about as worrisome as the rest of what she was describing. He took another deep breath. "Alright then Sabyne...How would you like me to stop 'being an ass', exactly?" Sabyne Kuznetsov Her eyes continued to burn as the fire sent sizzling smoke into that midnight gaze. The sound of his voice grated with irritation. She sighed and closed her eyes, not knowing how to reconnect. Cautiously, his sister started. "When we were kids…a year or so before," her words trailed off, not wanting to frame every comment with the memory of his leaving, "do you remember the Garbeski cousins?" Alessandra and Yvgeny were the same age as the twins, but Alessandra was twice the size of Sabyne and Yvgeny was ten times more trouble than Shayne. "Once, Yvgeny bet you that I couldn't beat Alessandra to the top of the giant oak tree in the center of town." She could still feel the glare of Alessandra's dark eyes, challenging her, with the confidence and certainty she would win. "Before you could say anything, I accepted the challenge. I was furious at the way she looked at me, embarrassed by my size and tired of you having to defend me." The wind whipped her crimson hair to the side, face following the breeze, she turned to look upon her brother again. "And you didn't miss a beat. You bet your dagger that I'd win. I was shocked. You loved that blade. Yvgeny only offered a gold in counter. I told you to not be stupid and to offer something else, that you were putting up something more valuable than a gold piece." Sabyne shook her head, as though the story were impossible to believe. She brought her hands to his face, cupping his cheeks in her palms. "You did this to me. And stared hard at me, and said 'Its not stupid if you win. And you are going to win.' And I did. Because you believed in me." Their matching eyes held each other for a moment before she dropped her hands and looked down at them "That's the Shayne I need. I need your faith in me. I need your support. Not your name calling, not your ridicule, certainly not your doubt. I don't even need your understanding, as it seems neither of us can understand the other. I just…I just need my brother's belief in me." Sabyne Kuznetsov Time stood still. Only the crackling of the fire implied the seconds were ticking by. Seconds turned into minutes, and Sabyne's shoulders sagged in sadness. Her eyes closed, lips frowned in understanding. "We aren't who we once were. It was foolish of me to think it would be possible to reclaim the past." His twin stood, moving closer to the fire, extending her hands to warm them, her back to Shayne. "We..." Sabyne paused. "We don't know each other anymore. I don't know what you've been through, beyond not being with us. You don't know anything of me, other than that I've missed you and what I just explained. But none of that fills in who we are." She glanced over her shoulder to her brother, then back to the flames. "I fell in love. Then he broke my heart...or I broke his. Well, both, to be honest." Her eyes glistened with the thought of Maksim. A hand lifted to wipe away the mist and smoke from her face. "I'm quite good in the forge. We're selling my blades, almost exclusively. The soldiers stationed at the garrison in town say they're as good as any they could find in the city." A hint of pride eeked through her voice. She turned to leave, sighed, and reversed her turn to face her brother. "I've also been training with them. The sergeant has offered to sponsor me if I wanted to serve in the King's Army." Sabyne waited, looking to Shayne, preparing herself for him to not show any signs of caring. Name xDiceName xDiceResult xDiceString xDiceRolls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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